I had the most awful night and the most equally awful morning.
I feel like my heart has been broken all over again. I’m not ready to write about it here. I don’t know if I’ll ever be, but just know that I’m hurting inside.
But enough of that. Let me tell you about the good thing that happened to me today.
I’d completely forgotten today was our town hall meeting at work. Basically it’s a quarterly meeting where the entire company gets together to talk about what’s happening across all departments.
To be quite honest, all I wanted to do was to get the day over with so I could go home and crawl into a hole and die. I looked like shit, I felt like shit. My eyes were puffy and I’m pretty sure I only had mascara on one eye. I had no desire to plaster on a smile and make small talk with anyone really. But I did anyway, because that’s how we get through the tough times. We grin and bear it and get the job done.
Each department recognized someone on their team for outstanding work. Then it came time for my department. Admittedly I barely listened to Paul make his introduction. I was standing there, leaning against the window of the conference room, staring off into space, wondering what I was going to do with myself when, amongst the cloud of negative thoughts my brain was swimming in, I heard him say my name.
There was applause. I stood there… stunned and grinning like an idiot, mouthing thank you to everyone. And then Ryan expressed his immense gratitude for everything I’ve done for him and for everyone else. And for the first time today I really smiled and I felt the anxiety and the tension of the night before drain away through the bottoms of my feet. And I stood there, close to tears, only because I needed something good today and this was indeed good.
I don’t talk about my job a lot, but I really enjoy what I do. And it makes it even better when my hard work is actually validated.
I needed this. After the loss I had yesterday, I needed something else to balance out the score.
When I first started at Webdex, I was paid next to nothing being straight out of college. I was ok with it though. After all, I saw it as a stepping stone in my career. However, the longer I stayed there, the more I wanted to see the company succeed as a whole than just me alone. I think the remaining folks would probably agree with that.
I did get to take photos with my new camera lens. It was really nice, however, I am beginning to see SOME disadvantages to having a fixed focal lens–the biggest being no zooming in and out. Half, it had difficulty focusing in the dim restaurant light, but it could’ve been the operator not metering the shot right or the fact that I was running on a pretty low battery. I think next time in lighting like that, I may try a different setting like shutter priority. I DID like the fact that I could take photos of everyone around the table and no one really noticed or paid any attention. That was exactly what I wanted to achieve.
More photos here.
Today, our office is at a standstill because somehow or for some reason, our server got locked up by all this outgoing spam. So, while our resident computer-fixer-guy is working on it, I’ve come up with a list of things to do (in no particular order) at work while you can’t work.
- Complete whatever tasks you CAN complete without email, printer, and/or file server access (which, believe me, is limited).
- Follow up on personal email correspondence.
- Catch up on your social networks (Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, etc.).
- Shop online and make a wish list of stuff you want to buy and stuff you wish you could afford.
- Clean your desk and catch up on filing.
- Actually talk with your coworkers face-to-face rather than via AIM or email.
- Search your to-do list for something SOMETHING you could do that doesn’t require email, printer, or file server access.
- Have a meeting that you’ve been putting off or have scheduled meetings earlier.
- Call your mom to see how she’s doing.
- Talk to your coworkers about dogs and chickens.
Ok, so I intended on having a video tutorial up tonight, but it turns out I won’t have any time to finish editing the video until tomorrow evening. I spent all day working on a client’s newsletter that I almost totally forgot about the presentation I have tomorrow around noon. Luckily I have my outline of speaking points, I just need to put together the actual power point which means I’ll be working on that tonight instead. I feel like I’m having a college flashback.
Totally unrelated, but I couldn’t remember the name of the muppet that always forgot stuff so via Google’s Suggested Searches, I found out his name was Forgetful Jones. This then brought me to an entire wiki dedicated to muppet knowledge. You can find it here. Amazing what comes up in Google search results!
Originally his last day to clean was Thursday but he returned Friday to clean out the rest of the stuff in his closet, some of which were these trash can liners. Rather than tossing them, he wanted to give them away so I figured what the heck, I’ll take them. As I showed him where my car was, he told me that he’d been cleaning here for 14 years and would really miss everyone in our building. Although I’ve only known him for the 4 years I’ve worked there, it would be very sad and very strange not hearing the wheels of his trash cart come rolling into our office around 5:00 Mondays through Thursdays.
Goes to show how even the smallest most insignificant roles can have a huge impact on a community.